McFly - The Ballad of Paul K
![[image]](http://i289.photobucket.com/albums/ll229/DudaC/Fanfics/balladofpaulk.jpg)
It was one of these cold winter nights, when the streets become desert and the only colour you see is white. The snow fell down from the sky slowly, resting upon my shoulders and my head, and I had to shake like a wet dog to take it out of my hair.
I could see my footsteps on the ground, and I have walked a long distance. I didn’t exactly knew where I was going, but I hope it was very far. Very far from everyone. Very far from those I thought were my friends.
I saw the snow gently cover up my footsteps, and suddenly, a lot of them were missing. I stopped there, looking around. I was alone. All alone now.
I sat in the ground, closing my eyes and forgeting about the freezing weather. The wind kept blewing on my face, sometimes creating some small cuts on my cheekbones, but I didn’t care. I felt numb, I couldn’t feel the pain because I have tasted it too much untill today.
When life has been unkind
And you´re losing your mind
Look in the mirror afraid of what you'll find
It feels like time´s not on your side
My name is Dougie Lee Poynter. I’m only fifteen years old, but I really wished that I was only six, because when you are a children, nothing bothers you, nothing hurts you. The only thing that worries is the desert after dinner, or if you are going to get that new bike. You don’t have responsabilities, you don’t know anything about real life and you don’t feel nervous when you are talking to a girl.
Girls aren’t something that I get on easy with. Actually, I’m kinda scared of them, they can be really cruel when they want. They should come with a translator, or a book telling you what to do or what don’t do. I have already dated, I have to add, but I am a terrible boyfriend. She dumped me right on the next day.
I guess I’m trying to say that life sucks. And kiss my ass those who think otherwise.
He doesn´t like to mention
Applying for his pension
So his children don't know he's heading
Into a mid-life crisis
He can´t afford the prices for
The new kitchen floor he´s buying
He's been a drunk of his life
Two kids, a dog and a wife
He doesn´t know
And in the daytime he just sits and watches television shows
Why am I acting like a emo person? Why am I running away from home? Why am I running away from those I thought cared about me?
The reason is that I am runnig away from a perso I thought that should be by my side and never leave. That person that teaches you how to play soccer, that person who helps you with the girls, give life advices and many more.
That person who should be my own hero, and that person is my dad.
Recently, I found out there was an audition for a bass player. Almost pissing my pants off, I went there, with my bass and my small courage. I only knew it were two guys; Thomas Fletcher and Daniel Jones, and that they wanted a bass player and a drummer.
Feeling my heart beating strong and fast, the palms of my hand sweaty and eyes blinking in an excessive form, I did the audition, and surprisingly, it was very good. Although I threw up before it, but anyway, forget that part.
A week or less later, I received a phone call telling me that I was in. I can’t tell you how crazy and happy I went, I jumped upside down and screamed a lot, and all the neighbours complained. But I didn’t care; that was like a dream come true for me.
Of course my mother went crazy too, but in a bad way. She thought it was madness leaving school to enter a band, but I think I made her see how it was important to me. She went through, and I thing she saw how happy I was.
My father, on the other hand, was acting a little strange for a long time. His smile wasn’t the same anymore, nor his laugh. It was cold, fake and somehow sarcastic. There were dark circles under his eyes, because he couldn’t sleep well through night. His mood was always angry and he seemed to loathe everything.
He seemed to be fading away.
The ones you love you hate now,
you feel down and blue
He left this morning. Without saying goodbye, without saying goodbye to his son, his daughter or his wife. He simply turned his back upon to us, like he was telling to us that we were living a lie, that it was just a fantasy and we had to wake up.
I want to wake up and found out that it was just a nightmare, that he’s still there, and smiling to me.
When it all seemed to be ok, when I moved from home and start living with the guys of the band, I thought nothing would change at home. But I was wrong, and I feel hard on the ground with the truth.
Why had he walked away? Have I done something wrong? Have I been a bad son? Have I been blind all along, beacause I didn’t see this happening? Have I been to late, and I could have stopped it?
“I WANNA KNOW WHY, DAMN IT!”, I screamed into the empytiness. My voice was strong, but I was shaking inside. I couldn’t see things clearly, there was tears falling of my eyes, and it wasn’t because the cold wind that kept slapping my face. “I WANNA KNOW WHY!”, I repeated. I knew no one was listening, but it felt good to say it out loud.
My lips were dry, and I felt the taste of blood. I couldn’t breathe normally, and I couldn’t keep my eyes open. The wind was blowing strongly now, and the cuts on my face were getting bigger. I couldn’t stop the tears that were falling of my eyes, and I was sobbing loudly now. I hugged my knees, curling up into a ball, and I rested my chin in the top of my knees, closing my eyes while the tears traced paths in my cheekbones.
I didn’t know that I would be in so much pain like this. I thought I wouldn’t cry, I thought I wouldn’t ran away.
Look at what you've thrown away
They stood beside you all the way
Now its too late, its too late for you
“I found him!”, I heard someone yelling, but I didn’t raised my head to see who was. I already knew.
I didn’t want to be found. I want to be all alone there, with me and my pain. I wanted to suffer by myself, not in company. I tried to be quiet, so they couldn’t hear me sobbing, but I thing they were already running in my direction, because I could hear steps comming in my direction.
“Dougie!” a second voice cried.
“Doug, are you ok, mate?” a third person said, and it were next by me, I could hear his voice closely.
I tried to clean the tears on my sleeve, but someone pulled me, so that I could be on my feet. I blinked my eye one or twice and I looked at the three guys in front of me.
Three guys, with seventeen years old who dreamed to be musicians. One of then was rather chubby, with red cheekbones,
rounded face, straight nose, wide open brown eyes and blond hair. The second was a tall guy, with dark blue eyes, dark hair and with
a worried look on his face. The last one was nor tall nor small, with dark hair dyied blond. He had light blue eyes, and there was a big
smile on his face.
It was my band mates: Tom Fletcher, Harry Judd and Danny Jones.
“Dougie, you almost made Danny have a heart attack!”, said Harry
“He was almost crying like a girl when you dissapeared!”
I tried to smile, but all I done was to stretch up my lips. They
seemed to notice it, and they were quiet for a few seconds.
“Well, what about going home?” Tom asked, walking towards his car.
“I think it’s a pretty good idea.” I answered, and I truly mean it.
Home wasn’t the place I was running from. I was running from the
footsteps a while ago I was following, the ones that my hero have traced. But, just as him, they were fading, leaving me all alone in nowhere. So, going home, going to somewhere I was sure I’d be
happy sounded like a good idea for me.
They spend all the way to home trying to make me laugh, and I must say they were good at this. Somehow, in some point of the way, my sad tears became happy tears, because I was laughing so hard. We couldn’t hear the music playing on the radio.
And you´re losing your mind
Look in the mirror afraid of what you'll find
It feels like time´s not on your side
And in that moment I saw, that my hero have changed it’s face. It was no longer my father. It was those dudes that were there with me, making me smile when everything was falling into pieces. I could count on them.
They were my heros.
